OPP

[iceman111]

Originally Posted by UncleHasBeen

They usually say it is friendly, vibey and a bit flirty.
They like it.
Then they asked this. "So will this be exclusive and discrete?"

How do u respond to this question, especially when you have one or more FWB?

[UncleHasBeen]

Originally Posted by iceman111

How do u respond to this question, especially when you have one or more FWB?

Depends if she is worth the exclusivity.
But for me, i would make it clear i cant at this point.
And i also want to let her know that i can revisit this question again later in the future if we are still together.
For discreet, always a yes.

[Peacekeeping]

Originally Posted by UncleHasBeen

Young senior here, sharing on how to listen and learn from women so that we can be better lovers to our significant other

Young uncle sounds nicer lah. Nowadays 30yrs old can be called uncle. Senior like senior citizen, sound too old. Now not sure how many married couples can be called lovers when work and kids take up most of the time.

[UncleHasBeen]

Originally Posted by Peacekeeping

Young uncle sounds nicer lah. Nowadays 30yrs old can be called uncle. Senior like senior citizen, sound too old. Now not sure how many married couples can be called lovers when work and kids take up most of the time.

For a start, any married couples should at least dont become strangers or worse, enemies over time

[UncleHasBeen]

I received a few questions that are similar in many ways.
So instead of replying them one by one, i would paraphrase the questions and reply them here.
And at least i dont have to reply them individually over and over again.
At the same time, other samsters are welcome to chime in.

Question:
Got to know a single lady.
She is concerned about meeting up because i am married.
How do make her feel comfortable with me?
How do i make her willing to be more intimate with me, at least potentially.

She is also hesitant to meet.
We only exchanged photos. Texted only, no calls.
How can i make her less shy and open up more to me?

[UncleHasBeen]

My humble views:

U wont be able to address her concerns because she could have many angles looking at your marital status.
If someone I am keen said that to me, I would assure her that she is only dealing with me and not my married status. Just me.

If she cant get over that, she cant.
U must let it go.
Its pointless trying to convince or force it on her because she already made up her mind.

Hesitant to meet but willing to exchange pics and text with u?
She has some interests but she isn’t sure about herself.
She has no confidence in herself.

U cant make her less hesitant.
U can only assure her that u are who she sees right now.
And there is more to u which she might like more if given the chance to show it to her.
Assure her there is no rush.
U and must make a stand here.

If we go around looking like heat-seeking missiles, the ladies will mostly backed out. Make a stand.
Let her know there is a lot more of u that she would like if she let u have the chance to show her.

And that u will only bring yourself in with the two of u, only u, not your marriage. Then stop there.
Don’t do anything more. Be confident and don’t give in.

Take it or leave it. See how she reacts.
Seriously, there is no other way unless u want to lie or change yourself for the time being to get her.

No one is worth that kind of effort in this side-dish affair.
This is only a side-dish affair right? Remember that.

[crazymani]

Have you hooked up with anyone that is a friend/relative of your wife?

Or a common friend of the both of you?

[UncleHasBeen]

Originally Posted by crazymani

Have you hooked up with anyone that is a friend/relative of your wife?

Or a common friend of the both of you?

None simply because i do hook ups in person.
Not through apps but courses and workshops.
And i do it patiently and slow. I dont jump on them.

The closest to that scenario was with my ex-colleague's ex wife, many years ago.
She was on the prowl and i was the meat. Not even kidding.
After we ended, i found out some time later she went to prowling on other meat.
Husband found out for the 5th time and they agreed to divorce.

I was her 2nd meat that her husband found out

[UncleHasBeen]

She is my FWB a divorcee while i am her OPP

[UncleHasBeen]

She is cool and horny like that

[UncleHasBeen]

[UncleHasBeen]

This is one babe that my heart goes out to her.
She is 31 this year. We started fucking in 2019.
She was 27 then. Me 47.
She was married by 25.
Got quite a serious health issue at 26, 1 year into marriage.
Her husband just switched off and disengaged due to her condition.

At 27, legally divorced. Her health issue was gone, the treatment helped.
And she told me that when she got the results back that she was cleared, she bumped into me at the dance school.
She was into me then because I was the only person that didn’t give her the weird look due to her hair and overall demeanour. She was recovering then.
And we fucked since.

She was divorced after 2 years of marriage.
Just got out of a horrible health condition after 1.5 years.
She literally had a new perspective of life.

I told her I was married. She didn’t mind.
We happily enjoy each other’s company since.
Which is why even today when she bumped into me and my wife from a distant, she knew to keep the distance.
Because me and her, we have a good thing going.
She has been my FWB since day one. I am her OPP.

[UncleHasBeen]

This is why I need to wine and dine my targets first.
This filtering process is a must, a screening.
It is not 100% fail proof but it is on the high side.

Pussies yes any time.
But not pussies that has teeth that bites and chew on the inside.
A FWB or OPP is not a defect.
It is just a label outside of our martial and relationship social norm circle.
Which means there are very good characters willing to play this label.

So it is our utmost responsibility to get the best one to go with us on this journey.

[crazymani]

thanks @UncleHasBeen for the replies.

The way you put it - it feels a lot like courtship except that you made known that you are married and not looking for love relationship/emotional thing.

The part I feel that is impressive is - ladies knowing the above fact, then proceed to have a sexual relationship with you. You somehow are able to sell it that the ladies are not losing out but in fact gaining from such an arrangement.

Most ladies will not want to be involved - or at least the ones I know.

When you ask them out, those that rejected, I would presume you stop there? cos it will be obvious that they dont want to have anything w you. Does it affect your reputation some how? It seems like you only do it through Dance classes where these ladies are not within your normal social circle so even if the word gets out, it does go to your social circle (i.e friends, colleagues and relatives).

[UncleHasBeen]

Originally Posted by crazymani

thanks @UncleHasBeen for the replies.

The way you put it - it feels a lot like courtship except that you made known that you are married and not looking for love relationship/emotional thing.

The part I feel that is impressive is - ladies knowing the above fact, then proceed to have a sexual relationship with you. You somehow are able to sell it that the ladies are not losing out but in fact gaining from such an arrangement.

Most ladies will not want to be involved - or at least the ones I know.

When you ask them out, those that rejected, I would presume you stop there? cos it will be obvious that they dont want to have anything w you. Does it affect your reputation some how? It seems like you only do it through Dance classes where these ladies are not within your normal social circle so even if the word gets out, it does go to your social circle (i.e friends, colleagues and relatives).

I am assuming all women in this context would view me as someone lusting after their bodies.
Totally acceptable and i dont deny.
Which is why i need to wine and dine them.
On one hand to show them that besides having an intimate relationship with me, there might be other perks.
For this, my maturity needs to take one for me.
Imagine if i come across as someone young dumb full of cum, my chances of taking them along for the ride is much lowered.

I have been doing for this for a long time, before and now being married.
Very few women would want me for sex. As of now, i only met about 7.
But that is 7 out of at least 30 successful FWB/OPP.

So the majority are attracted to me simply because of my perceived charm.
Not my looks which i dont have or my bod.
My perceived charm. What they think and make of it.

They think they are getting into a relationship of intimacy, a little romance and rendezvous. Hide and seek, covering trails.
Then sex, that would be the bonus and last perk that they would offer.
Which means only if i can offer all the above or they think i can offer all the above then the thighs are spread.

I have high numbers of FWB/OPP not because i am attractive, which i am not.
I got those numbers because i try and try. Rejection to be me is good because at least i know what she does not want and where i could have presented better.

Reputation? This helps me.
Words get spread around within that specific circle.
Like dance classes, baking workshops or dive classes.
Such reputation will tickles those curious and daring ones

Words wont get out, how could they?
Remember i wine and dine first.
I watch them for specific signals, body language and eye contact.
And i never ask first. I make the first move but i never ask first.
The willing pussies always ask first. I never ask.