[Newtonyork]

Advice?
I hang out at the other forum, the 'international' one that everyone knows, but I'm here because I'm a long time Geylang monger. And reading everything written here has helped me find some real gems in Geylang pre-covid. But these days, mainly because of porn I have become curious about trans women. Recently I was in Bangkok, and checked out some ladyboy bars and I didn't go beyond just some kissing and titty sucking, but I really wanted to do more. I know there's nothing to be confused about, nothing to be conflicted about, but I can't understand within myself why I won't make the leap to doing more with them. I seek advice, and I've posted here and there on this forum with the same question, how did you know this was for you and how did you experience your first time with a trans woman? Am I just curious? Is it the porn I'm watching? I like them to be very feminine, and I suspect I might like them either as pre or post op. I was at Straps and Obsessions in Nana, and some of them were so beautiful it made my head spin. Didn't matter whether they were equipped or not. They were just so beyond feminine, I felt like my dick was about to explode right there, In places like CheckIn Bar and WhyNot bar, most were less beautiful but the ones I spoke to were the most stunning there that night and if I was more ready for this, I think I woulda done the short time thing. In a way, it's a good thing Bangkok is so far away for me, the temptation is incredible. I know, I'm in some form of denial. I fucked a ton of chicks on my trip, but some nights I would hang out around outside Thermae, walk the streets just to look at the ladyboys. Some of them are so stunning. It really blows my mind. I know porn ain't real, and it ain't gonna be like that, but I am so curious it's just crazy. I get the mistake I'm making, that I'm qualifying them as 'they', though they are trans, they are still chicks like all the other cisgender chicks I fuck in Bangkok. I know, it's a slow process, and I think I need time to come to terms with this, any advice from my Singaporean brothers is greatly appreciated.