How to have sex with herpes
 

Recently got to know a 25yo girl through okcupid, went for 4th date dinner 2 days ago and she told me she has herpes, 4 years already. She is looking for ONS/FWB, fed up after lousy relationships lol

I quite like her but unsure of whether and how to proceed. She had a few long term partners, most of the time do raw, but they never got infected. Any advice on how to minimize chances of infection and what is the long term strategy from the bros here? Chances are that i go visit FL also likely some of them have herpes already right, and if never get from them then chances are low? Or should i not let my small head take over?

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

Need to be careful, a former SB of mine got it after she got date-raped (allegedly anyways...). Anyhooo usual thing is that its usually contagious only when active, but the problem is that its active a few days before it shows symptoms or may not always show symptoms, so you are always kinda at risk. Now after initial infection, they usualy have a really big and painful episode and then it kinda becomes less over time. Some have it every month, some have it once a year..... stress or immunity weakness can cause it. So bottom-line is, there is always SOME risk and you need to judge for yourself how much of a risk you are willing to take. Condoms help a lot yes, but it can transfer skin to skin as well. What does help a lot are anti-virals - if she is on antivirals for herpes, she becomes a lot less contagious, but for many people its not convenient to take pills daily and also they put a lot of stress on the liver. Do note, once you get it - so far there is no permanent cure. Maybe some day, but not yet.

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

Herpes is a very common infection and the majority of those infected never have any symptoms.

Chances are you could already be infected. The best way to find out is to get tested.

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

I have herpes. Had it for the past 6 years. Between then and now, continued to make love to my wife, had a kid and no problems. At the start of my infection, I used to have an outbreak every 3-6 months. I got myself circumcised and the outbreaks are far less frequent and when they happen, the sores are small and they heal very fast, in 2-3 days. Over the past 3 years, I barely have 1 outbreak per year and I hardly know it is there. It is not something I think about anymore.

If you start a "raw" sexual relationship with her, herpes should not be on the list of your worries. HIV is.

As other bro mentioned , hsv symptoms varies from ppl to ppl.. for me I have to take pill daily else I have frequent outbreaks within 2 weeks to 1 month. And severe outbreak(itchy and painful blister) once a while. With pills I get mild outbreaks once a few month. Some months I stop the pill to rest my kidney and liver.. then I will get a severe outbreak as well... It take around 5 to 7 days to recover and leaves scars .. So think wisely with the big head, if u willing to eat pills daily for rest of your life before taking the risk.

Had a kid after contracting herpes? Any risk of transmission to the wife or kid?

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

I think no risk giving it to my kid unless i dick slap him lol

My wife is fine

That’s good to know!

Just abstain la bro.....why must die die try your luck

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

Its been many years since the first outbreak and I think over 3 years since the last outbreak. Risk is negligible.

You have to inform gynae if wife has herpes and he will examine your wife vagina for existing infection to advise on the risk of transmission to the kid during delivery. Usually doc will give antibiotics to wife close to delivery date

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

She's a ONS / FWB only... dump her and find the next one.

People like to mention Genital Herpes are common... yes it is common... but this is mostly in the western countries. Alot of statistics are taken in western countries.

And it is not right to go and risk yourself even thou it's common. If you know someone got Covid, will you go la ji with her even though Covid is common now?

Men can carry herpes without symptoms.. and they mostly resolve itself when a man grow old to about 40... that is why there is no effective way to test for herpes for men or women over the age of 30s.

And this is also why women are encouraged to take HPV vaccine by 26 years old or so and after this age subsidies are no longer available for women taking the vaccine as it's no more encouraged.

Genital herpes affect women more than men because it is the cause of cervical cancer. It can cause penile cancer in men too but it is extremely rare.

It will depend on whether our immune system can fix the virus over time. It is said usually it take up to 2 years for our immune system to fix it, or never.

So the take away is,

1. If you got a daughter... let her take the vaccine as long she's qualify for it i remember it is 16 or younger...
2. We can't really avoid herpes due to it's prevalent and even condom can't protect against it... so... if you know someone has it... obviously don't go and poke her...

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

Hey bro I think you mean genital warts from HPV; genital herpes is caused by HSV and usually presents as a vesicular rash on the skin
- outbreaks decrease in frequency as time goes by
- immunocompromised states can lead to increased frequency of recurrence

That said; it’s a good idea for everyone, especially younger females to be vaccinated against HPV prior to sexual activity

Re: How to have sex with herpes
 

Oh yes HPV!